I have a friend. There is… something going on. Something is wrong. Something is different. Something is amiss and i do not know what it is. Not exactly anyways.
I asked him what was wrong, what was different, whats going on. I read his response, he said he was just busy lately. He claimed it was nothing when there was clearly something, but I pushed it aside. Things got worse, more weird, more distant. Finally, he admitted there was something. I almost had to force him into talking about it. But he admitted things would be better once its all said and done.
This situation was particularly frustrating because it’s over something supposedly insignificant, but we allowed it to affect our friendship much more than it ever should have. Denying that there was anything going on just caused the problem to snowball into a situation that only caused weirdness, confusion, distance, and hurt.
Avoiding conflict is typically a good thing, but when there is an obvious issue, stepping around it will only cause things to worsen. If my friend and I could’ve just discussed what was happening earlier, we could have prevented this and fixed the problem early on.
So many people take the passive aggressive approach whenever they’re upset, but things will never be fixed if they continue to do this. If you’re experiencing a problem with somebody, the only way to understand why it’s happening and how to get it to be fixed is to talk about it. I’ve had so many times where a friend was obviously upset with me, but they just pretended they felt fine. I would ask if they were mad and what I did, but they would just deny that anything was out of the ordinary. It would just cause me to wonder what I did wrong, and worrying that I might do it again in the future. There’s no way to fix what you’re doing wrong when you don’t know what it is.
This situation with my friend has only strongly reaffirmed what I already believe. If there is an issue or something is bothering you, it’s so important to talk about with the other person involved. Get everything out, talk about it, apologize where needed, find a solution, make things better.